Motivating reluctant children to speak a home language

The participants were invited to share their ideas for increasing the input children get in the minority language, and increasing the children’s need to use the language.

Here are a selection of the suggestions shared by participants about how to create opportunities for children to have more language input and interaction

At home

• Use software to increase language input: interactive games/apps in target language on iPhones, iPads, computers
• Smartphone, TV in home language
• Switch electronic devices to the target language
• Interactive toys that speak the minority language

Online interaction with native speakers (relatives or friends)

• Video conference (Skype) with monolingual  family members
• Skype time with relatives and other kids in the other country
• Bring the iPad with Skype conversation into the Lego box to join the children’s play

Reading books, magazines or other materials

• Reading books in minority language
• Magazine subscriptions (paper or online)
• Audio books – buy or borrow from libraries; swap with other families
• Comic books written in the minority language, they will be motivated to know how to read
• Carer reading story books and recasting it into the minority language
• Book club in the minority language

Community

• Arrange minority language teaching classes with the help of some other families with the same language
• Send the child to community language school if it exists
• Alliance Française/Confucius/Goethe institute
• Parent can visit the class at school
• Private language lessons appropriate for their ages
• Access to other children of the same culture – build a network of friends in minority language
• Play groups with minority languages (coffee together for carers!)
• Community groups and cultural community based activities
• Community church
• Games – play groups in home language
• Preparing a short speech or song to be presented in the community gatherings
• Join the Vietnamese events – that improves both the language and culture knowledge
• Making gatherings and functions for those people who speak same language: e.g., independence celebrations, potluck dinner,
• Share kai – traditional/cultural food with other speakers of the minority language
• Language weeks celebrated

Contact with the old country 

• Get children to write to monolinguals (pen/email pals, birthday cards to family members in home country)
• Sending to parents who speak the minority language to stay there for a while, or home stay in minority language country or someone’s place in NZ

At home (notice the varying levels of ambition here, and that some families have more than one parent or carer who speaks the minority language, while others may be alone in their language with a partner who doesn’t speak their language)

• Only speak native language at home. Strict rule!
• Always speak minority language to anyone who speaks it, even outside home. Don’t worry about the English!
• Let children hear the language all the time. Children automatically learn and understand the language spoken to them.
• Dinner time table talk in Maori/Samoan only learn new phrases for this time/bath time/bed time
• Getting majority language speaking parent to participate in minority language learning
• Making it a game!
• A day of the week or time of the day when only minority language spoken
• Create environment for the language: make a language island and speak the language at home
• Encourage children to chat at home in first language and find friends to interact with who also have the first language
• Have a party with minority language theme
• Getting mum and dad to speak Samoan to the kids
• We as parents speaking our languages to children
• Asking grandparents to speak only their language when we are around them
• Ask other members of the family to encourage the child to speak mother language
• Set aside a special time for an activity in L2 each day (something fun, e.g., making craft, story time/singing nursery rhymes) keeps it current and fun for kids
• Children have to speak minority language when they ask for buy things they want
• Have a language day at home where you only speak one language, e.g., during dinner or games
• Strategies: In early childhood, have puppets to role play
• Enrol them in a sports club that speaks minority language and  buy them video games of minority languages
• Labels around the house to help children learn words
• Karakia (prayers) written and at the dinner table
• Celebrating special events for them
• Participating minority language culture/game
• Join cultural club in minority language
• Learn poems, songs, and rhymes
• Use the minority language: greetings, music, dancing, food, dressing up
• Make a time for the language hour at home (every Sunday morning or so)
• Board games with language, can have other language speakers and they explain with certain idioms
• Word games (I Spy, charades, etc.) with prizes
• Cultural classics and amazing moments in history, as told in target language
• Creative play – using words

Travelling to where the target language is spoken

• Travelling through South America to immerse in Spanish
• Send him to my mum to only speak Swedish
• To make friends with the same language children
• Back to our country for a while
• Holiday back to China to enrol into a local school for a month
• Shared holidays with other families
• Going camping together

School activities and school strategies to motivate students

• Pre-school or kindergarten in an international setting
• School wide speech competition presentation – poetry or short story bilingually per term
• Preparing for events at school where the kids are expected to use their home languages
• A language week of their own culture within school setting
• Find (or start) a local pre-school that teaches the language and culture
• Sharing your culture language with teachers and children we want to learn more
• Have language competition days
• Involve school/pre-school by assisting child to share their language with other kids using posters, etc. (e.g., body parts labelled)
• sharing things about their culture with the older kids in school
• parents participating in school activities and kids taking roles
• Schooling: language cultural activities, i.e., Kapahaka

Materials for target language (CDs, videos, music, YouTube, radio) 

• Music in native language
• Drama/cartoons/films in native language
• Web radio station – cheap and efficient can have it on all day
• Nursery rhymes
• Watch TV programs: TV on demand
• Digital music, movies (DVDs in Spanish), CDs in the car
• Picnics and playing music and dancing
• Maori television
• YouTube – songs, Action songs
• Waiata CDs
• Friends/family send videos of them
• Songs are fabulous for children language development
• Kids TV show: Find Samoan and Maori language programmes to watch
• Video that children like and watch again and again
• Show videos of other countries – they will know that there are other people that speak other languages to learn a minority language
• Stories, songs, with gaps that the children fill
• Watch video clips with them and strategically ask questions
• Watch music videos and listening to music in that language
• Encourage kids to learn nursery rhymes/songs from minority culture and play CDs so they can sing along

Strategies for motivating children (these won’t all suit all parenting styles and beliefs)

• Encourage them to play and communicate with their peers
• Encourage children to speak/learn own language
• Pretend not to speak language – child helps parent
• School teachers can encourage children to learn their language
• Praise out loud especially for younger children, they are happy when we praise them
• Letting child choose a movie or a game in minority language for a Friday family night treat
• Using the language positively and not for correction – make the language fun!
• Showing the benefits opportunity of being bilingual, e.g., business, travel, sports
• Having more input at home, invite minority language speakers to come and visit
• Pull and not push them towards the minority language
• Make them proud of being bilingual, show that it’s special that they have access to things non-speakers don’t
• Build the self-esteem of the child
• Lots of trips back home at least once a year
• Reward children when they use the minority language
• Appeal to heritage/love of family/ancestors’ identity
• Make them feel speaking a second language is special and important
• Give them a chance to use it and feel like it is important
• Being responsive in expressing and hearing minority language spoken
• Introduce our culture, like festivals, rituals, mysteries, stories to our children as early as possible, so they have attachment with their culture through the language
• Support their interests, e.g., baseball with children who speak the minority language
• Bribe them
• Make your culture more fun to them
• Build interest in some areas, for example, games in some areas of interest and learn language from there: Chinese chess for example
• Fun things, e.g., Japanese animation – kids love them
• Only respond to the child when the child speaks in the minority language
• Stickers – use for special acknowledgement
• Satisfying for my son when he knows the words to sing along!
• Recasting what they say in English into the minority language is better than pretending not to understand what they say
• Helping teachers to learn basics of children’s home language
• Treats for children when they speak the minority language
• Dinner table language – “Get the food”, etc. – use minority language
• Having a family outing where we only speak the minority language
• Cooking together and recipes
• Nanny/au pair who only speaks French

Starting school

Download Starting school  

Organising a workshop on raising children with two languages

The workshop has three primary aims:

• To gather those parents, teachers and others in the local community who are concerned with children growing up with two languages in the hope that they will get to know each other for a mutual exchange of experiences and tips.
• To establish contact with those who represent the local authorities and schools in questions concerning the position of pupils who have home languages and who may require support in the majority language.
• To develop ideas together to support children’s development in both languages and possibly to make the initial contacts necessary to start minority language groups where children can meet others with the same minority language and develop their language (for example, toddlers’ group, play-group or Saturday school).

The workshop is designed to fit into an evening, with the option of getting together for a follow-up evening if there is enough interest. A possible arrangement is the following:

Have a number of pages prepared with room for eight to ten names on each. The papers should be labelled with a topic, for example:

• How can we optimise our children's linguistic development?
• How can we help our children to appreciate both their cultures?
• How can migrant parents improve their knowledge of the majority language?
• How can we get the most out of our family’s stay in this country?
• How can we support our children’s schoolwork in the majority language if we don’t speak it well?
• How can we make the most of an intercultural and/or mixed language marriage?

Select topics on whatever suits the participants’ interests. As people arrive have them choose which subject they want to discuss and write their name on one of the papers. Anybody wanting to be in the same group as a friend should write their name on the same piece of paper. Give each participant a name tag they can write their name on and pin or stick on their chest. They can also indicate on the name tag whether they are a parent, teacher or whatever.

The person organising the workshop needs to work out the following details:

• Think of people you would like to have come and speak at the workshop and make arrangements with them. You need a keynote speaker (maybe a researcher or teacher) and someone who can give a completely different kind of perspective for the final debate, maybe a local politician. Decide on your date with your speakers.
• Find a suitable location. While it is very difficult to estimate how many will come, try to find somewhere where everybody can sit together and listen to a speaker and then break up into groups for discussion and coffee.
• If you have to pay for the use of the room, or for speakers, you will have to charge admission. Make sure you don’t leave yourself out of pocket. There may be money available from some authority or other for this kind of activity.
• Recruit and prepare your leaders for the evening. Apart from being generally helpful, collecting admission fees, giving out name tags, serving coffee, etc., they will need to lead the group discussion and be prepared to report on it so all participants are informed about what all groups have discussed.
• Arrange tea or coffee and biscuits or whatever refreshments are appropriate in your country. You'll also need name tags, pens, paper and any kind of speaking aid such as a computer and/or a projector for your speakers if these things are not already in the room.

Family language policy

I have to say that I have been very strict… as soon as English was spoken in my house… I’d say: “Hé, hé, Dutch! Children, Dutch!” And that’s how I did it from the start. Yes. Yes, it was just a rule. At home we speak Dutch.
Dutch mother living in Christchurch

There are many ways for children to hear a minority language even in a very monolingual country like New Zealand. A good place to start is inside your own home. All families are unique, and have different language needs, constraints, special skills and opportunities. For example, in some families both parents share the same first minority language whereas in other families the parents are mixed language (this means each parent has a different first language). Some families immigrate permanently to New Zealand whereas others move here just for a short visit. You can think of how your family decides to use the language(s) you speak inside your own home as being your family’s ‘language practices’.

There are some common language practices that can help you work out what to do with your own family. The one person–one language (OPOL) method is when each parent speaks their own language to their children. This is a popular method that feels natural and easy for many parents, and means children can learn two minority languages if parents speak one each. It can be difficult for children to hear much of a minority language spoken by a parent who works long hours outside the home, however, and a parent who does not understand the minority language at all may sometimes feel left out of conversations. If both parents can speak the same minority language then the one language–one location (or Minority Language at Home, ML@H) method is another alternative. This is an especially good method to use in New Zealand since English is so dominant in the community that children will usually pick it up very quickly once they start school or pre-school, even if they have never heard it spoken at home.

In families where neither parent speaks a minority language the whole family could embark on a language-learning journey together, or perhaps the children could be looked after by a foreign au pair. There is no right or wrong way for children to grow up with a minority language and no one language that is better than another. Any exposure – even from a parent who is not completely fluent in the language – is better than none, and any language can enhance your child’s life!

Links to help you create your own family language policy

• Let’s Bust Some Myths About Raising Bilingual Children
• Blog written by Sarah – an American non-native French speaker raising her children in French
• Two parents, two languages – 2P2L, twice the benefits of OPOL?

Minority language play-school

My first idea was to organise a French playgroup. At the time I had a lot of time and two children aged two and four, the third one came a bit later, we met once a week. We were about ten mothers, it was very nice and that’s how I created my first circle of friends because we would talk between ourselves and sometimes we’d say: “We must do an activity with the children” so we’d play a game with them. I thought it was important for them to hear other people speak French to show them that they weren’t the only ones with that oddity, that they shared that with other families.
French-speaking mother in New Zealand

The difference between the parent and children groups discussed above and this kind of group is that in a play-school setting the parents leave their children with a teacher or leader. For this reason, this kind of group is better suited to older pre-school children, around 3–6 years. In some countries children start school during this period, in which case another arrangement may be better. But assuming that a group of 3–6 year olds can be assembled, this can be a beneficial impetus to their use of the minority language. Of course, the success of this kind of arrangement lies almost entirely in the hands of the teacher. She (such teachers are usually women) will need to be very capable and inspire confidence in young children who do not know her and their parents. Many children, especially the younger ones, might refuse to be left. Many teachers are unwilling to have parents around, especially if only some of the children have their parents there. Nonetheless the children might need a settling-in period with a parent nearby, perhaps waiting in another room. Could the waiting parents arrange some amusement for themselves? What about playing Scrabble or doing crosswords together or having a reading circle to read books in the minority language and then discuss them? Such activities all play their part in keeping the parents’ language skills fresh.

Depending on the size and age of the group, the teacher may need a helper. In some groups, parents take it in turns to help the teacher, but this does not always work out too well in our experience, and it might be better to employ an assistant teacher. This kind of group is generally more expensive for parents unless local authorities can subsidise it. The teacher and assistant will usually need to be paid, as well as any rental to be paid for the use of a room and the cost of toys, equipment and stationery. This kind of play-school is often one afternoon a week, but if the parents’ budget can stretch to twice a week it is probably better from the children’s point of view.

Checklist for play-school organisers

The person organising needs to take care of the following matters:

• Funding: balance the books! How much do rent, equipment and teachers’ pay cost? Look into grants. How much should parents pay?
• Location: where can the play-school be (see above for suggestions)?
• Recruit a teacher. She needs to be a native speaker of the minority language, but she should be aware of the majority culture that most of the children have lived in all their lives. We once had a newly arrived American teacher in an English play-school in Sweden who tried to talk to the children about Star Trek, which had not been shown in their lifetimes on Swedish TV.
• Get together a group of children. There should probably be at least 12 children in the group. Any monolingual minority language children are a great asset in the group to help prevent the other children slipping into the majority language.

Planning

The idea was also shared by my husband… we both shared the conviction that bilingualism was an extraordinary thing we could give our children… When we decided to come and live here together I said the number one condition would be that we speak French at home.
French mother living in Christchurch with her Kiwi husband

Raising bilingual children requires some forethought and planning. Although speaking more than one language is very common in many parts of the world, it is unusual in countries where most people are monolingual English speakers (this means they only speak English). For example, in New Zealand, English is the ‘majority language’ due to the vast number of people who speak it. All other languages, including the indigenous Māori language, can be thought of as ‘minority languages’ in the New Zealand context.

Parents wanting to raise their children to speak one (or more) minority language(s) in addition to English should first discuss together what languages are important to them and why. It is helpful to talk together about the level of proficiency you hope your children can achieve in each language. For example, would you like your children to be able to use the language to talk to relatives on the phone? Or would you like them to be able to read and write in the language and, if so, to what level? Parents also need to think about what opportunities their children will have to hear the minority language(s), and how to find other speakers of the language(s) to turn to for support and encouragement when needed.

Planning these things in advance can help prevent disagreements and complications within the family later on. Language learning is a part of children’s development and parents can talk about it together just as they talk about other factors like their children’s manners, the clothes they wear, the schools they attend, and so on. Even if parents do not completely agree on the specific details of their children’s bilingual education, it is a very positive step if bilingualism is the topic of discussion and debate!

Read more about planning a family language policy in Growing Up with Two Languages.

Links to help you with planning

• Ministry of Education resources for bilingual Pasifika living in New Zealand
• A step-by-step guide to planning your language journey
• 12 things parents raising bilingual children need to know
• Raising bilingual children: the first five steps to success

Parent and children group

The aim of this kind of group is to let minority language parents and pre-­school children meet other children and parents with the same minority language to sing and play. Most groups meet once a week for about two hours, but other arrangements are possible. If there is a large minority language community, you may be able to meet more often. Not everyone can come every time.

What do you need?

The first priority is to investigate the matter of funding. There may be money and/or other help available from municipal authorities for this kind of group. Maybe you can also get help from the authorities to find somewhere to have the group’s meetings. Otherwise, finding a suitable location is the next problem. You will need either to borrow toys that are already there or to buy your own toys and store them in the room you use. Village halls and churches may have their own play-groups or play areas. Perhaps you can use such a room and borrow the toys without having to pay too much (or even for free). You will need access to toilets and changing facilities.

It can sometimes be difficult to get a group of parents and children together. Some tips for getting to know others with the same minority language are given under Networking in Growing Up with Two Languages.  A workshop of the kind described in this site can be a good way to meet others in the same situation as you. You might consider advertising your play-group in local shops, religious meeting places, child care centres, clinics, etc., or in a local newspaper.

You may want to have some kind of snack during the group’s meeting. Parents can take it in turn to bring something along if that is what works best. You could have a duty roster where parents can sign up for particular weeks. They can then be responsible for arriving early and getting things ready, staying behind to clear up after the meeting is over as well as providing the snack. If the group is big, maybe two parents will be needed each time. The parent whose turn it is can also lead the group if any leadership seems necessary, although groups often work out a more or less set order of events. Some activities will need preparation.

Younger pre-school children are not always open to too much organising and may prefer just to play with the toys. If the parents get involved with their play they can make sure there is plenty of language happening. Songs, finger play and a simple story are often all the structured activity the under-3s can deal with. Arnberg (1987) gives an example of a possible order of events in this kind of play-group, involving planned free play with dolls or cars, active play with singing games, talking about a topic with pictures, snack, song and finger games, drawing or clay and a story, with each activity being allotted 15 to 20 minutes. Many of the activities might be beyond the youngest children. This is not a problem, since the parents are available to activate them in some other way. Perhaps the younger ones can play some more with the toys while the older children draw.

Things to bear in mind:

• There should probably be at least ten children in the group, to prevent it petering out too easily when somebody leaves or cannot come several times in a row.
• It is generally not a good idea to have a child come along with a majority language-speaking parent, unless they usually speak the minority language together. To avoid confusing things, the group’s meetings must be kept free of the majority language.
• The group is for the children’s benefit, not primarily a chance for the parents to chat. Left to themselves, children of this age are likely either to use the majority language or just to play quietly by themselves. The parents need to play and talk with the children to stimulate their use of the minority language.

Reference

Arnberg, L. (1987). Raising children bilingually: The pre-school years. Clevedon, UK: Multilingual Matters.

Bonding

I believe that language is related to emotions… Speaking the Korean language doesn’t simply mean to be able to speak the language, it means that the three factors [language, emotions and culture] are related to each other like chains. I thought if they [her children] were not able to speak the Korean language there would be big gaps between us.
Korean mother living in Christchurch

Many parents report feeling that they can properly bond with their children only when they are speaking their own first language with them. For parents in this situation, one advantage of raising children speaking a minority language at home is that the minority language may take on a special significance as it becomes associated with affection, comfort, love, and the intimacy or familiarity of home. Also, communicating with their children in a language in which they are highly proficient helps parents stay better involved in their children’s lives and interests outside the home as they grow older.

Speaking a minority language often also has positive implications for bonding with extended family, such as by ensuring that children can communicate with their cousins, aunts, uncles, or grandparents, for example. Parents who do not feel that the country they are living in is ‘home’, and who are able to travel back to visit their ‘home’ country with their children, also expose them to the rich culture, heritage, customs and rituals associated with the minority language. This is one important way for children to learn about, and be proud of, their heritage.

Another way for children to learn about their heritage is through literature, by either reading for themselves or being read to, in the minority language. Classic texts can influence beliefs and customs in culturally significant ways, which may be more deeply understood in the original language rather than via translation.

Links about bonding in your own language

• Family-wide benefits of speaking a minority language at home
• When grandparents have no common language with grandchildren
• 3 ways to boost language ability and loving bond with grandparents
• Losing language: the subtle epidemic
• Choosing the ‘right’ language for your child

Saturday school

Once children reach school age they do not have much spare time. They may have a series of activities ranging from football to ballet to chess, as well as all the time they spend with friends, playing computer games, and maybe even doing homework. An extra morning or afternoon at school might not stand very high on their list of things to do! Nonetheless, if the minority language community is large enough, it might be possible to get together a group of children to study the minority language. Many countries offer no provision for home language teaching of children who have a minority language at home, leaving it up to the parents whether their children become literate in the home language or not. Parents might find it easier to support their children’s literacy in the minority language together with other children.

Ideally, a qualified teacher should be enlisted to help, but if that is not possible, perhaps the parents can pool their resources. The parents need to get together and work out what they want from the Saturday school (which can equally well happen on another day), i.e., whether the children are aiming at going back to school in the home country or if it is enough for them to attain reasonable reading fluency to open the world of children’s literature in the minority language. Are the children to learn to write and spell in the minority language? There are materials and support available from home-schooling organisations and groups here and there. Otherwise, parents might contact schools and teachers in the home country for advice about materials and methods.

The practicalities of setting up a Saturday school are not any different from those for the other groups: funding should be looked into, but may not be available. A room needs to be found, although toys are not necessary. If there are only a few children involved they might be able to meet at each other’s homes. A teacher must be recruited if the parents are not to do the teaching. Books and writing materials need to be bought.

Children of school age are capable of making their own decisions about many things. Parents may need to put some work into motivating their children to want to go to school in their free time. However much fun you try to make it, reading and writing are very like what the children do all week at school. If they are not motivated, they will not enjoy their Saturday school, and are unlikely to learn very much.

Good luck in anything you organise for your children!

Keeping track

Documenting a child’s linguistic development

The sheets provided here are intended for you to use to keep track of your child’s acquisition of languages. They are in Word format so you can easily edit them, or use them for inspiration for making your own sheets on a computer using a word processor or a spreadsheet. Have a file or notebook especially for your notes about your child’s languages. You can record anything else you notice about your child’s linguistic progress. You can use these sheets to see if one language is maybe racing ahead of the other. This may be known and expected, but the sheets give a measure of what is going on and a chance to see if anything the family changes has an effect on the development of the child's languages.